Tick, going for the gold

Last night when I went in the bathroom to get ready for a shower, I noticed that I might be getting an ingrown hair, in my nether regions. I am quite limber so I put my foot up on the sink to get a better look. Guess what I found?
A teeny tiny baby tick had attached itself to my nether region. Of course I thought, it is warm and moist here, why not. I did not panic, but once I figured out the cause of all of my discomfort, it did make me feel a little squeamish. I tried all the home remedies that I knew to try and get it to pull his little head out, I smothered him in Vasaline, I smothered him in soap, I wiped him with isopropyl alcohol, I painted him with finger nail polish, and yet the little bugger did not pull his head out. By the time Mr. Anti-Hippie got home the tick bite really itched and my neck hurt from bending at such an angle. Mr. Anti-Hippie went right to work on helping me out, not to mention he kinda likes hanging out down there. Unfortunately when he tried to remove said tick, the tick was too small and he only got the body.
As of right now I am alternating between lemon and potato slices to try and draw the head out, the lemon is oh so fresh!! I am a very nature oriented person, so ticks do not surprise me, but ticks going for the GOLD, do!