Found: Baby Sitter

All this week I have been struggling with the fact that I have to find a baby sitter for Baby Gnat. In fact I have been struggling with this since we left the awesome sitter when the school year ended. I contacted Community Child Care Connections and they emailed me a list of providers in V-Town and G-Town. I called all the providers here in V-Town, and either they were full or they did not answer their phones nor did they call me back when I left a message.
I resigned myself to the fact that I would have to call the names of the providers on the list, in the town south of here. The first person I called had 2 spaces available and I scheduled an interview for last night. I invited Mr. Anti-Hippie to go along, as he did not really like our other sitter. See she was in the process of being licensed and this is the Anti-Hippie's first baby so he was real nervous about her being there, I on the other hand made the executive decision and she went. I loved that sitter she was the greatest. Anyway I digress, we went to the interview last night and Anti-Hippie liked her, her name is Jamie and she has been doing daycare for over 14 years. Her house is nice and seems really kid friendly. I have a good feeling about her, but I still miss R. I did not ask about cloth diapers, but she will do breast milk. Baby Gnat will be the youngest child in her care.
I am very nervous about leaving Gnat with anyone. I feel confident I did make a good choice. I am just worried about all the changes that will be happening the next few weeks. I resigned from my job, I start student teaching on August 18th, Eddy starts school on August 18th, and the Anti Hippie is on his AT with the Navy starting on the 18th. I freak out at change, even more so than a kid would, I resist change, I am scared shit- less of change. But, every new adventure starts somewhere. Right?

You do not live here anymore

Dear Jim and Becki,

You no longer own this house, you sold it to Mr. Anti-Hippie and Earthy Birthy Mama. It is no longer your worry. We have two smaller children and if we want to tear up your old landscaping to make our yard bigger we are going to do so, if we want to rent a skid steer and move piles of dirt, it is our business to do so, if we want to move the rocks we can do so because we now own the house. Please quit driving by to see what we are doing. You are so creeping me out! And while we are at it tell the nosey neighbors to quit calling you every time we move a stick in our yard!

Love, Earthy Birthy Mama new owner of the house in V-Town

You're OUT

I just got the call, he is outta there. I need to take some deep breaths on my way to pick him up. Get this: he was not listening!! Go figure, so much for date night tonight and one more night without him. I am so LIVID right now I could just spit. So off we go to pick him up. He was asked to not come tomorrow for the program, so Earth Muffin I won't be there :(

Letting it Roll off my back

So here is where I usually post something really SNARKY about Crabby Patty, but today I am all grown up and I will not let her get to me. I am letting it roll, roll, roll, right off of my back!!

And it's One, Two, Three Strikes Your Out

Eddy Haskell is at Nature Day camp this week. He is staying with my parents all this week, and he was under direct instruction not to misbehave this week, at camp and at the grandparent's house. Nature camp has a strict discipline policy that states if you get three strikes during the week they will call your parents and you will be asked to leave camp.
When I talked to Eddy on Tuesday he said camp was going well and that he could not wait until next year when the campers get to 'camp out' one night. Well, yesterday Crabby Patty calls me and tells me Eddy has something to tell me, he got two strikes. He failed to mention that one of the strikes he got on Tuesday and the other one he got Wednesday. I was so angry with him, one for being dishonest, as he has the propensity to tell people what they want to hear and two because he is such a smart kid who really should not be getting in to trouble.
So I drove up to my parents house to lecture the kid, on being dishonest and to scare the bejeebers out of him so that he won't get the THIRD strike. I laid it out that he would not be watching television, he would be going to bed early, and he would not get to go to camp early in the morning, he would be arriving at the same time as all the other campers.
So, this morning he and Crabby Patty called me to wish me a Happy Birthday. I reiterated to him once more that he does not have anymore warnings, that the next inappropriate behavior he exhibits will get him kicked out of camp.
Let's hope the phone does not ring today. And boy howdy let's hope that he keeps it in line for the next two days.

My Baby is One

I have not been blogging for the past few days because:
a.) I have been busy
b.) I have been spending time with my family
and c.) Eddy left for camp on Sunday and is staying with my parents.
Yesterday was Baby Gnats first birthday, we actually celebrated it on Sunday with family, all except my parents and grandparents. See we had a party on July 4th for my Grandma's birthday and my mom and grandma gave the baby her gifts on that day. That was fine with me, except my mother Crabby Patty gave the baby an American Girl Doll, she got her Nikki the 2007 American Girl Doll of the year. Nikki is good with animals and is training a dog to be a service dog, very fitting for my mother, but WTF? Baby Gnat cannot play with this doll, not now and probably not ever, this toy is for kids 8 years and older, it says so right on the box, and this doll is not even in production anymore, so will she be worth millions when Baby Gnat is older?? Anyway it is a beautiful doll don't get me wrong, but this is like the time she bought Eddy Haskell a Fiesta Ware Tea party set when he was like 3, and he never got to use it.
Anyway we did have a lovely party the other day, she got some great appropriate outfits for the fall and winter, she got some developmentally appropriate toys that stack and sort, and Aunt Kate made her the coolest book about our back yard. Kate made this book out of fabric and she put the koi, the birds, the turtles, my garden, the dogs, everything is in this book, when I get the camera charged I need to post some pictures of this, it really kicks ass!!
Finally the cake, the cake was a huge success. I cut 3 small seedless watermelons and stacked them on a plate to make a cake of sorts, then I put some whip cream and a candle on the top and ta da, we had ourselves some cake. The baby loved it, and I even let her have the piece with the whipped cream on it and she went to town. It was a lovely party and a lovely time was had by all.
I then took Eddy down the road to meet my dad, Red Green as Eddy is staying on the "farm" for this week while he is at camp. I do miss him, as it is awfully quiet around here.
Yesterday The Anti Hippie and I went to the capital city to do some shopping and Baby Gnat hung out with us all day, I did a play by play for her as to what was happening a year ago, as it was her real birthday. We had a great day and now I cannot believe that I no longer have a baby but a one year old girl!! Happy Birthday.

Mosquitoes

I was under the impression that because we had such a cold winter last year that the bug population would be somewhat diminished. Was I wrong? Apparently. The Mosquitoes here are the size of golf balls and they are ruthless, they bite and bite and bite. My legs are so very bitten right now, it is as if I were a small child again. Eddy Haskell's legs look awful, what with the scabs, the blood dripping onto his socks because he won't stop scratching, and the calamine lotion that I insist he uses.
I go outside to hang up laundry, or to take down laundry, or to water the plants, or to just be outside and I am eaten alive. Now, I have tried: rubbing myself with dryer sheets, dousing myself in Vanilla, dousing myself in Warm Vanilla Sugar body splash from Bath and Body, I bought some citronella spray from our food coop, I tried Off, I have tried Deet free spray, lotions, and homemade potions. Nothing is working, my face and neck are not safe from the mosquitoes wrath. As I have posted earlier I love being outside, although right now I am considering wearing full body armor when I venture outside.

My Name is Earthy Birthy Mama and I have an addiction

I love plants. I cannot stop buying plants. It all started several years ago when Eddy Haskell and I still lived with my parents. My dad, Red Green, being a true naturalist did not want non native flowers planted at his house so I started some container gardens. My first containers were very simple, geraniums, marigolds, and some petunias. The next year I had some containers of impatiens, some geraniums, some chamomile, and some cannas. When I moved in with the Anti-Hippie he and Eddy bought me some planters and various annuals for Mother's Day. Over the years I have planted numerous annuals and now some perennials. I usually start buying plants at the annual FFA plant sale at a local high school, then I visit various nurseries, this one being my favorite. I spend a lot of money on these plants, but my flowers are gorgeous. I also spend a lot of time watering, feeding, and pruning the plants. I know I need to stop, as most won't last through the bitter harsh winters of the mid-west, but I can't. Actually I can because I am out of potting soil, and containers to put the plants in, I actually used an old tool box as a planter a few days ago, because I was out of containers. The Anti-Hippie says it has to stop as well, although I could have other habits that are far worse. When I get some time I will post some pictures of my favorites.

Poop

This afternoon after Baby Gnat went swimming in her kiddie pool in the drive way and after she had eaten I laid her down for a nap. (She is still taking 2 naps a day!) I usually let her cry herself to sleep, I heard crying then I heard nothing. I got Eddy Haskell and his friend ADHD a snack as they had been busy playing video games. I heard the most blood curling screams from the pack n play where Baby Gnat was supposed to be napping. I poked my head inside to tell her that everything was alright, and what did I see? A naked baby girl covered from head to toe in poop. She managed to get her diaper off, whether this was before or after her poop I will never know. There was poop on the netting part of the pack n play, there was poop in between her toes, there was poop in her hair, there was poop everywhere. I guess letting the babe nap in only her diaper was a big mistake.
I promptly put her in the shower and cleaned her off, then I put on a fresh diaper and put her into the excer-saucer so that I could clean up the pack n play. I stripped the sheet and then took the pack n play outside and hosed that sucker off. I am here alone with the kids today because Mr. Anti Hippie had to work. Lucky guy! So now the pack n play is out drying in the warm sunshine, and I am having a beer.

I am not trying to be a bad mother

Next week Baby Gnat will turn one. I have no desire to have a big ass birthday party. The night she entered the world it was just the Anti-Hippie and myself, so I see that it is only fitting that we quietly celebrate the day that she came into this world. I am planning on having a few close relatives come over and eat some water-melon, and that is about it. I am not purchasing a "Dive Cake", a cake that a baby can get messy with, I am not making a cake. The girl absolutely loves water melon so that is what I will be serving.
I am not against having a party, but parties for babies are really for the parents and the grandparents. She will not remember it, although I am sure there will be lots of photographs taken. She is very special to her family, but we are not having a big party for her. I am sure that her cousin who was born two weeks after her, will have a big she-bang of a party, but I am not that baby's mother. I think that we might have a place where guests can write the baby a sweet note that I will tuck into her baby book. I know that this is my decision, but I just got a call from Aunt Duckie and she wanted to know about the party. So next Sunday you are all invited to my house for some watermelon and a real happening PARTY!!

WTF? Wednesday

#1. WTF Eddy Haskell? Are you going through puberty right now? Do you have to sass me and back talk me, and get the last word in all the time? Come on kid, I know having a sibling who takes all my attention away is not 'cool' with you, but kid you get to do everything your little heart desires. You get all the freedom in the world, just check in with me every so often so that I know that you are okay. Could you please cut out the BS, could you please just stop whining, and for crying out loud could you please stop back-talking me, or you will be in your room for the rest of the summer, enough said.

#2. WTF Mr. Anti Hippie? I know you and Eddy needed a hair-cut today, but did you have to come with me down to co-op pick up? I needed to go to B-Town for co-op pick up, then to WR to the credit union, then to BH to the grocery store to buy some meat, as I had an awesome coupon for like $10.00 off, then it was back home. I could have run all those errands in like 3 hours, but no. You needed a hair cut, which meant, that we go to co-op pick up, then to the credit union, then you are hungry so we stop at Sgt. Peppers for brunch, then you just want to look at the welding torches, so we stop, then we go get the meat, then Baby and I wait in the hot car for you and Eddy to get hair cuts, and then we take the long way home, because you want to look at the spillway at the lake. Mainly, because you want to take Eddy fishing there. Then we get home, and you are sooo hungry, and your stomach hurts. Okay next time go get a hair cut with out me, I hate being in a car when I cannot drive, so thanks but no thanks, I will drive myself.

#3. WTF Mother? So as I already mentioned I got these great coupons from the little grocery store, in the town in which I used to reside in. They still have a butcher who cuts all the meat, Wednesdays are the best days to get meat, so this being Wednesday and it is on the way I planned on stopping. Which brings me back to my original point, I had previously asked Crabby Patty to get me my meat, she lives really close to this grocery, and she shops there often. I kept on telling her, use the coupons and get me some 'riblets'. Well she had never heard of them, were they really called ribs, or spare ribs, or something else? No Mother, they are called riblets and I bought them all by myself and used the coupons, so there.

#4. WTF Summer Vacation? It seems as if I only started this vacation a few weeks ago, and really I did. But, I cannot believe that it is July 9th already. I always get panicked by July 4th, I know that it is the downward spiral towards the end of summer, yet I still have a ton of shit that is still on my "To Do List". So Summer vacation please slow down, I have just a little over a month left and then you will be gone. Please slow down, I have yet to take the kids to the pool!

Honey Do

Today it is kinda wet outside to Eddy Haskell and Mr. Anti-Hippie cannot mow the grass, I however have found many things on my honey do list that my boys can do:

• Take Tubs of clothes to attic

• Hang some stuff

• Make beds

• Clean House for company

• Get all laundry to laundryroom

Thanks, Earthy Birthy Mama

Tick, going for the gold

Last night when I went in the bathroom to get ready for a shower, I noticed that I might be getting an ingrown hair, in my nether regions. I am quite limber so I put my foot up on the sink to get a better look. Guess what I found?
A teeny tiny baby tick had attached itself to my nether region. Of course I thought, it is warm and moist here, why not. I did not panic, but once I figured out the cause of all of my discomfort, it did make me feel a little squeamish. I tried all the home remedies that I knew to try and get it to pull his little head out, I smothered him in Vasaline, I smothered him in soap, I wiped him with isopropyl alcohol, I painted him with finger nail polish, and yet the little bugger did not pull his head out. By the time Mr. Anti-Hippie got home the tick bite really itched and my neck hurt from bending at such an angle. Mr. Anti-Hippie went right to work on helping me out, not to mention he kinda likes hanging out down there. Unfortunately when he tried to remove said tick, the tick was too small and he only got the body.
As of right now I am alternating between lemon and potato slices to try and draw the head out, the lemon is oh so fresh!! I am a very nature oriented person, so ticks do not surprise me, but ticks going for the GOLD, do!